_{texts from last night meme (nsfw) // accepting !!}

_{i am going to go to turkey and bitch slap you so goddamn hard.}

_{& —– * peter parker // pain in the ass :}

_{‘’ Please ! I am a beacon of goodness ! ‘’ She was right about the whole lying bit though, he had to get better. Why wasn’t there a class on it or something ?! ‘’ Uh– he caught me indecent. ‘’ Not a complete lie, just– altering a few key details !  ‘’– I was, uh, just out the shower and I didn’t realise he was waiting for me in my room and– yeah. I’ll spare you the details. ‘’}

              _{“  you AIN’T. i’ve seen gangsters that are better than you.  ” realising that comment might cause s u s p i c i o n, she mentally cursed herself and glanced down. “  not that i know any.  ” her eyes shot up at his next comment, and an eyebrow ROSE. “  right, huh. again, lying ain’t your thing. its mine. remember ??  ”}

_{& —– * peter parker // pain in the ass :}

_{‘’ You are too realistic. Life is better if you add a little positivity to it, Fe. ‘’ Maybe she needed a pet ! Like a cat or something equally fuzzy ! ‘’ I know you will. ‘’ He nods in agreement, his small smile widening at the kiss, ’’ On Monday ? Wow, not giving me a lot of time to procrastinate, are you ? ‘’}

                _{“  i AM positive.  ” she c o u l d n ‘ t say that she stole things as a cat thief in her spare time and beat people up. “  you just don’t know me WELL.  ” no one really k n e w her. “  you tellin’ me you have things planned ?? well that ain’t new. FINE. i’ll give you a week.  ”}  

_{& —– * peter parker // pain in the ass :}

_{‘’ Ned is a modern day Mister Hyde, Felicia ! He’s hiding a monster under that baseball cap ! ‘’ Okay, maybe he was exaggerating a touch. ‘’ It wasn’t Flash, it was just this fight club I am a member of. ‘’ He somehow manages to say that with a straight face, hey maybe he was getting good at this lying thing. ‘’ I wouldn’t trust Ned with holding any valuables is what I’m saying. Be careful. ‘’}

              _{“  he’s A LOT better than you thats for s u r e.  ” a snigger was on her lips before she ran a hand through her hair with a small sigh. “  you were NEVER any good at lying, from day one of meeting you, just TERRIBLE — why’d drop it ?? you tell ‘im somethin’ ??  ”}

_{ENEMIES TO LOVERS MEME // accepting !!}

             <sub>“  i —– i don’t KNOW.  ” for once in her l i f e she didn’t know what to do. she was brought up — t r a i n e d — to always know what to do in any given situation. if it be taking down a room full of armed men or stealing the CROWN JEWELS, felicia knew what do to but right now, standing in front of the man who stopped her from robbing a museum last week, SHE DIDN’T.

her hands dropped from his cheeks and she stepped a w a y from him. this was an ODD feeling for her. she pushed out all feelings of love or attraction after ryan so this was n i c e. “  maybe ?? depends on your reason for kissin’ me back.  ”</sub>

_{& —– * peter parker // pain the in ass :}

_{‘’ See, this is why you need to hang out with Aunt May more often. She’ll warm your cold, cold heart. And that’s a Parker guarantee. ‘’ Wow, he really had to stop talking about his family in third person. It felt weird. ‘’ Did you just call me a– ? Okay, okay ! I’ll watch the other two, geez. ‘’}

                _{“  pete, i’m busy with work y’know that —– hey, i ain’t cold, i’m just realistic compared to YOU who thinks the world is a lovely n i c e place. it ain’t.  ” she let out a sigh, running a hand through her hair before the smile RETURNED slightly. “  it’s gonna make you watch them, though.  ” the smile g r e w as she pressed a kiss to his cheek. “  i’m going to quiz you on monday.  ”} 

_underoosed:

_{‘’–Actually I want to bang the dude sitting behind me in Algebra. ‘’}

           _{“  nah, he’s a fuckboy. stay away from him.  ”}

_{& —– * peter parker // pain in the ass :}

_{‘’ Because he means well, Felicia. I just– I know it. It’s the Parker superpower, we like to give people second chances. ‘’ And third. And sometimes fourth. ‘’ Is that the one with Harry Potter and all the wizards ? ‘’ He tries to feign an oblivious and innocent look, but his shit-eating grin gets the best of him. ‘’–I saw the first one, apparently the second one is terrible. ‘’}

              _{“  yeah well, i was brought up to believe, once an ASSHOLE, always an ASSHOLE.  ” she shot him a look that screamed bloody m u r d e r at his next words before she rose an eyebrow. “  bitch. you need to see ALL THREE. or i’m taking your phone again and i ain’t giving it back until you watch them.  ”}

_{kingsman: the secret service : sentence starters // accepting !!}

           _{“  then get it yourself, i ain’t your DAMN maid.  ”}